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Manufactured social pain is something added to the situation afterwards or otherwise created by outside forces, and REQUIRES THAT A NEGATIVE INTERPRETATION OF AN EXPERIENCE BE INTRODUCED that wasn't a part of the child's natural or initial reaction. For instance, nearly all of the lasting harm from sexual abuse is manufactured social pain. Most cases of molestation involve an adult engaging a child in sexual interactions or sexual affection, not violence or aggression. Research shows that children's responses range from finding such acts pleasurable and enjoyable to being curious or indifferent to them at the mid range to finding them embarrassing or uncomfortable on the negative end. (GCF, 2009) However, even in cases where the child finds the acts negative, there is rarely any overt hostility involved, (the person isn't trying to injure the child and usually isn't acting aggressively) so there is also rarely any implicit social pain. This, however, often changes due to outside influences.
Along come parents and other well-meaning but reckless do-gooders who add destructive meaning to the experience and manufacture or create social pain that never had to be. They tell the child how "dirty" and "evil" and "shameful" and "embarrassing" such an experience should be. They say horrible things such as "my child's innocence was stolen." They act distraught and horrified. Naturally, the child picks up on this emotional climate and becomes ashamed, embarrassed, and disturbed themselves. They took part in a "shameful" thing. They are tainted now, dirtied and forever marked by such contact. Then you have the biggest monster of all: the media. They are bombarded with negative messages from their surroundings that are intended to provoke feelings of despair, victimization, anger and grief. Naturally, the child learns to think of themselves as less of a person. All of these things add social pain to the child's perception of what occurred. In the many cases where a child felt even some degree of pleasurable sensations from such acts (a child's genitals are just as prone to pleasurable stimulation as are an adult’s), this piles all of that scorn intended for the molester onto their own shoulders. "If I found such an evil act interesting or exciting, I must be evil too," the child reasons. Further social harm is added by the conflict that arises between the child's parents and the perpetrator. The end result is that social hurt is rampant among sexual abuse even though this social shame has nothing to do with the act itself or the child's original experience. Others added it in afterwards, essentially abusing the child themselves through emotional means. It's extremely important that parents pay close attention to the possibility of manufactured social pain, because not only is it a big component of many negative experiences, but it's the one form of injury that is completely avoidable and within their control.
Regardless of whether social pain is implicit or explicit, it has the potential to be extremely destructive. It's by far the leading cause of psychological injury to children and adults alike. Social stress is particularly worrisome because if it isn't addressed and comforted, it doesn't die. It's routinely conjured up at any moment, with or without any significant new event. When social injuries go uncomforted or improperly addressed, each time the child merely thinks about it afterwards they can become consumed with social stress that can be every bit as strong as the original event. If a child is abused by a parent, for instance, and this social injury goes uncomforted, or worse, gets aggravated through manufactured social pain by others, every time the child hears about fathers, sees kids playing with fathers at a park, or watches a Law & Order episode about parental abuse, this unresolved social pain can come flooding back. If thoughts or environmental cues cause this flood of negative social energy three times a week for months and years to come, that's a lot of stress that can take a toll. It's why properly resolving social pain is so important.
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